Fluffyface: (to Fussypants in the tub) I'm coming behind you for soap!
Codemonkey: Guys really shouldn't say that to other guys.
Fluffyface: [Fussypants] tell [Know-it all] to get out of my room!
Fussypants: (at bedtime) I yu you my Winny. (My real name is Wendy)
Mini-Mom: (gathering firewood) This stick smells like a circus!
Codemonkey: There's probably cow poo on it.
Mini-Mom: He's eating the worm!
EA: Do you even know what that means?
Mini-mom: No.
EA: Good!
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Sunday, April 8, 2012
Monday, April 2, 2012
There's a Nap For That...
Ways I know my toddler is ready for sleepy time:
1. He is whiny about everything.
2. He is picking his nose (no really.)
3. He is whiny about everything.
Seriously though folks, Fussypants has some seriously adorable little character traits. He comes to me butt first to smell his poopy diaper when he has one. He makes adorable Popeye like faces at me when he wants something and I've told him no thirty times, in a last ditch effort to "cutify" me into caving in. He sings along in the car to show tunes with me, even though he doesn't know the words. He can identify the sound of a train from three states over.
One thing that is not so adorable is when he is in desperate need of sleep and he becomes the most miserable child for whom not even a rice krispie treat will appease.
This has become my slogan for just those such times:
1. He is whiny about everything.
2. He is picking his nose (no really.)
3. He is whiny about everything.
Seriously though folks, Fussypants has some seriously adorable little character traits. He comes to me butt first to smell his poopy diaper when he has one. He makes adorable Popeye like faces at me when he wants something and I've told him no thirty times, in a last ditch effort to "cutify" me into caving in. He sings along in the car to show tunes with me, even though he doesn't know the words. He can identify the sound of a train from three states over.
One thing that is not so adorable is when he is in desperate need of sleep and he becomes the most miserable child for whom not even a rice krispie treat will appease.
This has become my slogan for just those such times:
Sunday, April 1, 2012
The Secret of NIMH
So about two weeks ago, I started thinking I was losing my mind. I mean, full on "is this a stroke" craziness going on. I'd be in the kitchen and swear I saw a small shadow darting back and forth across the floor. Upon further investigation, I would be sure I was just hallucinating the idea of a mouse in my house. However, about a week after that, Codemonkey and I were sitting on the couch watching a movie, and we both saw the same shadow dart from under our entertainment center into the kitchen. Relieved though I was to know that I didn't have a brain tumor after all, I was a bit annoyed by this rather tiny creature that had caused me so much self doubt.
Codemonkey set up a trap and set out to remove the uninvited intruder. Well, nothing happened for several days, until finally Fussypants noticed the trap (and by noticed it, I mean he tripped over it and set it off.) Well, after Fussypants' inconsolable crying at the mere SOUND of the trap going off, I threw it away, assuming we'd need another method of pest removal. As it was, yesterday, that opportunity presented itself.
First sighting was by Mini-Mom, who emerged screaming from her bedroom shortly before lights out. Upon investigation, we realized that intruder had been living behind the washer/dryer and getting into the rest of the house via her bedroom closet. It was awfully cute, though. Just a little field mouse. Still, it needed to go. Discussion was had that since it was cute, we didn't want to try another snap trap, so we would try something else in the morning.
The Morning: I was standing in the mud/laundry room emptying one of 8 loads of laundry for the day, and I look down to the sight of this very naked, frightened version of Mrs. Frisby crouching right next to me, showing no signs of trying to hide. My initial reaction was to open the back door, and that it would be so ecstatic to see the world again that it would dart out on its own. Problem solved? Not so much. I opened the back door, and Mrs. Frisby just sat there. Just. SAT. THERE. So I grabbed my broom, and swooshed it out the door, feeling very 1950's if I do say so myself.
I wish the story ended there. Wait, no I don't, cause it got so much more interesting after that. So once outside, Mrs. Frisby just sits on my patio. For three hours, just sits on my patio. At which point Fluffyface, Mini-mom, and Know-it-all are outside playing and discover it. About an hour of Codemonkey and I saying things like, "No, we cannot keep it as a pet," and "Yes, it's very cute," and "Remember not to touch it," and "Fluffyface, watch where you are standing before you step on it," goes on until I finally have enough of this poor little defenseless creature being overwhelmed and terrified by all the tiny humans, and I send them in for dinner.
Assuming that one of the many snakes that are in this area will probably get to it by nightfall, we all go in and continue on with our evening.
Codemonkey gets up the next morning and as I am walking into the kitchen to help with coffee and such, he motions to the bay window, where Mrs. Frisby is sitting as though she belongs there. At this point, we are both in shock. This thing obviously WANTS to be here, and is not going away on its own. I start repeating lines from Marvin K. Mooney in my head.
So now what? Clearly we can't set the traps up, because Fussypants is scared of them and Mini-mom will cry if this cute little thing gets hurt in any way. A decision needs to be made before the tiny humans emerge from their rooms, so Codemonkey decides that just releasing it on our property will render the same result and that something farther away is called for. He gets dressed, grabs a Tupperware container and catches it. He drives a few miles down the road and lets it out. So all day today I am looking for our little friend that keeps coming over uninvited.
If Mrs. Frisby comes back tomorrow morning I'm buying her a cage with a wheel. Screw it.
Codemonkey set up a trap and set out to remove the uninvited intruder. Well, nothing happened for several days, until finally Fussypants noticed the trap (and by noticed it, I mean he tripped over it and set it off.) Well, after Fussypants' inconsolable crying at the mere SOUND of the trap going off, I threw it away, assuming we'd need another method of pest removal. As it was, yesterday, that opportunity presented itself.
First sighting was by Mini-Mom, who emerged screaming from her bedroom shortly before lights out. Upon investigation, we realized that intruder had been living behind the washer/dryer and getting into the rest of the house via her bedroom closet. It was awfully cute, though. Just a little field mouse. Still, it needed to go. Discussion was had that since it was cute, we didn't want to try another snap trap, so we would try something else in the morning.
The Morning: I was standing in the mud/laundry room emptying one of 8 loads of laundry for the day, and I look down to the sight of this very naked, frightened version of Mrs. Frisby crouching right next to me, showing no signs of trying to hide. My initial reaction was to open the back door, and that it would be so ecstatic to see the world again that it would dart out on its own. Problem solved? Not so much. I opened the back door, and Mrs. Frisby just sat there. Just. SAT. THERE. So I grabbed my broom, and swooshed it out the door, feeling very 1950's if I do say so myself.
Assuming that one of the many snakes that are in this area will probably get to it by nightfall, we all go in and continue on with our evening.
Codemonkey gets up the next morning and as I am walking into the kitchen to help with coffee and such, he motions to the bay window, where Mrs. Frisby is sitting as though she belongs there. At this point, we are both in shock. This thing obviously WANTS to be here, and is not going away on its own. I start repeating lines from Marvin K. Mooney in my head.
So now what? Clearly we can't set the traps up, because Fussypants is scared of them and Mini-mom will cry if this cute little thing gets hurt in any way. A decision needs to be made before the tiny humans emerge from their rooms, so Codemonkey decides that just releasing it on our property will render the same result and that something farther away is called for. He gets dressed, grabs a Tupperware container and catches it. He drives a few miles down the road and lets it out. So all day today I am looking for our little friend that keeps coming over uninvited.
If Mrs. Frisby comes back tomorrow morning I'm buying her a cage with a wheel. Screw it.
Saturday, March 31, 2012
Fluffyface is potty trained BUT... (Or, THIS is why we can't have nice things!)
he has this issue where he knows how to get to the potty on time, but not so much what appropriate behavior is while in there. I have gone into the potty room three times today after him to utilize the facilities myself, which has rendered the following results:
1. #1 in toilet, no paper. Toilet paper in random shreds all over bathroom floor.
2. Nothing whatsoever in toilet. Toilet paper and fruit snacks and live ants all over bathroom floor.
3. #2 in toilet, entire roll of toilet paper on floor of bathroom, none in toilet.
My reaction is usually something like this:
My bathroom looks like a rest stop off of Rte. 81 that no one has serviced in a month. Mini-mom is not so much afflicted as she has the master bedroom accompanied by her own bathroom (because I would have hated sharing a bathroom with three boys at that age.)
1. #1 in toilet, no paper. Toilet paper in random shreds all over bathroom floor.
2. Nothing whatsoever in toilet. Toilet paper and fruit snacks and live ants all over bathroom floor.
3. #2 in toilet, entire roll of toilet paper on floor of bathroom, none in toilet.
My reaction is usually something like this:
My bathroom looks like a rest stop off of Rte. 81 that no one has serviced in a month. Mini-mom is not so much afflicted as she has the master bedroom accompanied by her own bathroom (because I would have hated sharing a bathroom with three boys at that age.)
Things Tiny Humans Say (and things we say back...): Part One
Fussypants: (upon finding Codemonkey installing piece of computer thingy into his computer) "Daddy's under table workin."
EA: Yes, Daddy's working under the table!
Codemonkey: "Too easy."
Know-It-All: "that thing supported his weight?"
EA: "I don't even wanna know."
Fluffyface: "Fussypants hit me FIRST!" (Note: this is a standard of his, which he believes will keep him out of time out.)
Upon finding Know-It-All's science project drawn on with blue marker:
EA: Did you draw all over his project?
Fluffyface: No.
EA: Then why is your name written on the front in blue marker?
Fluffyface: I don't know.
EA: And why is there blue marker all over both your hands?
Fluffyface: *pouts*
EA: Yes, Daddy's working under the table!
Codemonkey: "Too easy."
Know-It-All: "that thing supported his weight?"
EA: "I don't even wanna know."
Fluffyface: "Fussypants hit me FIRST!" (Note: this is a standard of his, which he believes will keep him out of time out.)
Upon finding Know-It-All's science project drawn on with blue marker:
EA: Did you draw all over his project?
Fluffyface: No.
EA: Then why is your name written on the front in blue marker?
Fluffyface: I don't know.
EA: And why is there blue marker all over both your hands?
Fluffyface: *pouts*
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